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Actually, they were just normal bees. Call me an alarmist. But killer or normal, upon attempting to grill food tonight we found two little wasp nests inside our grill:
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Our choices were clear:
- Declare the back yard a total loss. Watch more movies. Maybe read a book.
- Spray poison into the grill, and get stung. Never feel comfortable using the now-poisoned grill ever again. Buy new grill.
- Attempt to scrape the nests from the grill, and get stung.
- Turn on the grill, raining down propane-y death on the wasps inside, and get stung.
Since I wasn't willing to surrender the back yard to the wasps, that meant that all roads let to getting stung. Which in a sense made the choice really easy--- with a level playing field sting-wise, one of the options stands out clearly as the best choice. Well, at least the most pyrotechnic choice.
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 To minimize the risk of getting stung in the process of incinerating my waspish enemies, I decided to create a home-made bee suit. This was, of course, an extremely stupid idea, and as such it needed to be thoroughly documented. My plan was basically to put on gloves, lots of clothes, and a jacket tucked into pants, but the weak point in my plan (okay, the weakest point in my plan) was the head area. What to do with the head...
Initial drafts of the design involved a Reynolds' Wrap window built around a sun hat, but the plastic wrap proved uncooperative. To put it mildly.
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 Well it turns out that in broad daylight you can see through a plastic trash bag pretty good, so I alarmed our neighbors by marching out into the june heat cloaked in winter jackets and garbage bags to smoke out our wasp adversaries.
Unfortunately there was no dramatic Flaming Wasp Attack, because of course the grill heated up far too slowly and they simply flew away. Anticlimactically, I didn't get stung, or even harassed particularly. I just threw the little nests over the fence. The end.
But you wanted to hear that I got stung, didn't you? Didn't you? For shame.
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